“I never told you a lie. I told you incremental escalations of half-truths.”

Nancy Clark (Goldie Hawn) to her husband, Henry Clark (Steve Martin) in Neil Simon’s “The Out-of-Towners.”

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File Server, Not Website — Irrelevant, and We Are Still Disappointed

The Wall Street Journal came to Judge Alex Kozinski’s defense, to wit:

1.  The judge was using a file server; it was not a website.  Funny, the judge referred to it as a site in his discussions with a reporter. This distinction is neither important nor is it the issue.

2.  The judge didn’t know the site was public.  Fair enough.  Not really the issue.

3.  A plaintiff’s lawyer brought the site to the attention of the LA Times.  Why is anyone surprised by this? Not the issue.

4.  Raunchy is not pornographic.  Ah, but not really the issue.

So, what is the issue? Continue reading

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My website is “odd and interesting,” maybe “prurient,” but not obscene like the guy’s films in the case I’m hearing.

Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals Chief Judge Alex Kozinski has one of the country’s finest legal minds.  His opinions are literature.  No weak argument makes its way past him.  But, Judge Kozinski had a website.  And on this website were photos of naked women painted as cows.  With a naked woman here, and a naked woman there, here a naked woman, there a naked woman,  everywhere a naked woman.  Judge Kozinski explained that he didn’t think the site was public.  Then he explained that his son uploaded most of the bad stuff.  Then he said he made a mistake and uploaded the wrong files.  Next, the dog ate my homework.  Continue reading

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Part-Time Drug Dealer Whilst Working for That Masters in Homeland Security

There were 75 San Diego State University students arrested for running a drug distribution operation.  The students, as one officer involved in the undercover DEA investigation noted, “were businesslike.”  Indeed, their operation for selling cocaine, marijuana, and ecstasy netted $100,000.  The Barometer is unable to confirm whether that 100 grand is GAAP compliant or whether there were effective Section 404 internal controls in the fraternity-based business.  Continue reading

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Mortgage Applications

BusinessWeek reports that 5% of mortgage applicants are still lying about their incomes on their mortgage applications.  Funny, a quick glance at the old 1040 could cut back on this problem.

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“It is not actually reality, but my reality.”

Author Misha Defonseca. Continue reading

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“I misremembered.” Roger Clemens

Some suggested the slugger may have “lied.” Continue reading

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MBAs and Recruiters

The Aspen Institute found, in a survey of 15 business schools in the United States, Canada, and Great Britain, that 50% of MBA students believe that their integrity makes a difference to corporate recruiters.  And, only 45% of those students said they would speak up if they saw an ethical issue on the job.  The Institute’s report is available online.

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Dating A Suspect’s Wife May Cross a Few Ethical Lines

A Phoenix FBI agent was arrested this week on charges related to his having an affair with the wife of a man that the agent had once arrested. The agent saw the husband’s case through to a prison sentence. Having your paramour’s husband behind bars for 18 months does reduce the odds of trouble from the husband. However, the story alleged by the Justice Department in its indictment goes downhill from there, from a law-enforcement-integrity perspective. After the hubby was released from prison, the agent allegedly fed information to authorities on the husband’s involvement in an armed robbery of a Radio Shack. Fifteen years was the penalty for the hubby.

But the indictment just gets better and alleges more – that the agent used his position to see to it that the wife’s (and the husband’s) son, who apparently had a hand in the Radio Shack heist, could turn state’s evidence and get a favorable plea deal. Ah, the old trick of sending the husband up the river and reforming the son. It’s not the stuff of an Austen novel. But it is a conflict of interest. Continue reading

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Superior Skill, Insight, and Industry, or Fraud?

Kyphon employees sold, sold, sold Kyphon’s products for spinal fracture repairs. One rep took his territory’s sales from $16,000 a month to $200,000 per month in less than a year. Incentive programs do produce miracles. The whizzes in organizational behavior can document as an unassailable proposition that if you want results, “incent.” But, most incentive programs don’t take into account the tendency of “incented” employees to outsource those miracles. Miracles aside, employees with incentives can get creative. So, you end up with lots of sales followed by a $75 million settlement with the federal government for Medicare fraud under a corporate integrity agreement that will find you monitored as you spend, spend, spend on compliance and ethics programs.
Continue reading

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Those Impish Patriots

Matt Walsh, a golf pro from Hawaii, is speaking up about those Patriots. Seems Walsh was a video operator for the New England Patriots from 1999-2002. Walsh says that he taped the Patriots’ opponents’ signals, tape that he says was then used by the Patriots for intelligence that was then used when next the foes battled. If you know the signals, then you know what defense has planned. Offense is then a tad easier. There are some classic quotes in the whole scenario that show me ethical issues in the NFL are no different from product safety and financial reporting missteps in business.

From Patriots’ coach, Bill Belichick, “I misinterpreted the rules.”

From Jacksonville Coach Jack Del Rio on the videotaping, I think all teams do that. That’s been going on forever.” Continue reading

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A Conflict Is a Conflict Is a Conflict Redux

Brilliant researchers at Cornell find that a new imaging technique can detect lung cancer early enough to allow removal of tumors.  If the physician-researchers are correct, they have made a major break though.  The problem is the researchers did not disclose that their funding came from a charitable foundation funded by the Liggett Group.  They also did not disclose their pending patent applications for the technology.  Cries of foul have emerged as the physician-researchers fret that valuable science is being discredited because of “tobacco taint.” No one denies that the science is good.  No one doubts the abilities of the researchers.  I dare say no one questions their integrity vis-à-vis data.  None of this changes this simple fact:  a conflict is a conflict is a conflict.  There are only two ways to manage a conflict:  Don’t do it or disclose it.  Continue reading

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“Yikes!!!!” “Double Yikes!!!!”

Wachovia Bank executive to another executive upon her realization, through 4,500 customer complaints, that telemarketers that paid Wachovia for access to its customers were defrauding Wachovia customers. Continue reading

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Two Questions and a Thought on Eliot Spitzer

How did he find the time? I’m not managing a state, serving as a superdelegate, or harassing legislators, but I have to cut my showers short to find enough time in the day for meals. Yet here we have a governor who was arranging all the details of his dalliances, right down to train transportation for the tryst. Clearly, voters need to tighten up the governor’s job description to keep idle hands from becoming the devil’s workshop or playground, as the case may be.

What was he thinking? For those who still subscribe to the well worn theory that personal life is personal life and public life is public life and ne’er the twain shall meet, think about this. Bad judgment is bad judgment. If a public official puts himself at risk for exposure and pressure via purchasing services from a prostitution ring, are you comfortable that the public official has reached a level of maturity and judgment that warrants the keys to the kingdom?

One final thought. If you are going to clean up corruption, a little introspection and self-discipline are necessary tools of the trade. Paul Wolfowitz was drummed out of the World Bank for participating in decisions on his girlfriend’s salary and position at the World Bank. Squeaky clean. Those who would clean up must first point the finger inward.

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